Psychology
Coping With Loneliness After a Breakup
“When the dust settles, the light shines solely on you; there you see no one but your shadow.”
Life feels so different once you’ve broken off with your partner. You’re unsure whether to celebrate or to mourn when you’re single again. Your routines have changed, and the lifestyle you have is altered; starting from zero, not knowing what to do. You find yourself balling up in a blanket in your room or somewhere in a bar drinking solo; you ask yourself, “What do I do now?” Coping with loneliness is a difficult and energy-consuming recovery for a person to go through.
How To Cope With Loneliness
Let’s be realistic. Some days we don’t feel the crippling loneliness; sometimes we have all the energy in the world to do anything. But then one day, all your friends are busy, and the weight creeps in and your energy is all lost, and now the sadness of being lonely weighs you down. Of course, this is a normal situation and you are never alone. People have their way of coping with being lonely, it can be unorthodox, simple, or weird; either way, what matters is that you’re able to cope.
Getting Yourself To Move
Activities, activities, activities. You don’t necessarily need to do anything strenuous or physical. Anything to be productive would be enough. Here are some unisex examples on how to cope with loneliness after a breakup.
#1 Travel
Dare yourself to travel to places you don’t normally go. Doesn’t have to be outside your hometown or country. You can go from city to city, or the mountains, beachsides, riverbanks, lake towns, or anywhere you can think of. Study shows that traveling to a new place helps you cope better than staying at home.
If you have a vehicle, be it a motorcycle or car, a simple road trip would suffice. You don’t necessarily need an activity when you reach a destination. Driving somewhere is therapeutic. It feels a little mindless when you just cruise along the road, looking around the scenery; if you’re daring enough, take the other route that leads to your destination.
Just remember to stay safe and don’t get yourselves in trouble. Fun experiences should also be safe.
#2 A Total Makeover
Assuming you spent most of your time moping and wallowing, your place would look like a mess. Schedule yourself a time and day when you can give your house or place a deep cleaning. Clearing up and organizing your stuff helps you focus, keep your mind working, and clear out what’s bothering your mind as well. Once you’ve finished cleaning everything up, reward yourself a little by taking a long shower to help refresh your mind.
#3 Hobbies
Hobbies are activities that allow you to relax and enjoy. They’re supposed to make you feel happy, and accomplished, or give you the drive.
Do you have a hobby? If you don’t, then why not start having one? Having a hobby is like a little routine for yourself that doesn’t require much pressure. You could start a plant collection, make some sweaters, do some writing, anything that involves you doing something. Some people start learning how to do crafts despite not being artistically inclined, while some people learn new skills such as cooking despite having no culinary background.
#4 A Self-Care Day
Male or female, you need a day to take care of yourself. A trip to the spa and receiving massages or scrubs would be nice. Get a fancy haircut and go for a daring look you never thought you could pull off. Do some retail therapy; nothing wrong with spending something that can help you feel pretty/handsome.
If you’re not into spending so much, a day at home that doesn’t involve you wallowing in your bed would be great. If you’re into movies or TV shows, load up a show, ready some snacks, and just mindlessly immerse yourself in the show. You can do your self-care routine, take a long hot bath, do some deep skin cleaning, and give yourself a total makeover and shine.
#5 Work Up a Sweat
Nothing like a good workout to keep you active and occupied. The gym will become your best friend if you truly dedicate yourself to working out. Not only does working out improve your physical strength and endurance, but it also helps with your mental clarity, and every exercise requires you to stay focused on maintaining your form while providing adequate strength.
Working out will become a routine for you. Not only that, but you will also learn how to discipline yourself. The gym is also a social place; you can find like-minded people who are there working out for the same reason as you. Form friendships, learn from coaches, and there you can build a mini family/friend group.
Reflection
With all these activities, there’s one thing that you will face every night or whenever you’re all alone in your thoughts — facing yourself. Self-reflection is the key to coping with loneliness. Acknowledging your past and what has happened will always be heavy, but it’s a healthy way of accepting that it’s already happened. Acceptance within yourself is a difficult way to cope, that’s why some therapists or counselors can help guide you. Don’t be afraid to face yourself or have others help you face yourself and deal with your loneliness.
