Relationship Problems
Long Distance Relationship Anxiety and Its Struggles
“The distance and the time between us — it will never change my mind about you babe”
Handling a relationship with a person you see often is already a difficult task; how much more so when you’re handling a relationship where you and your partner are miles or islands away from each other?
It is often unfortunate that people have to deal with long distance relationship anxiety. This is usually because long-distance couples experience fear, miscommunication, adjustment issues, trust issues, and a lot of misunderstanding. The good news? It can be overcome.
A study shows that the younger generation by the median age of 20 are more participative in engaging in a long-distance romantic type of relationship, yet it has also shown that the majority of them failed due to miscommunication or the lack of effort from one party. And with the polarizing view of social media and television series/movies portraying long distance relationships, people often misunderstand LDRs as either simple or heavily complex.
While partly true, LDRs are never extremely simple or complex. Rather, it is a mixture of simple instructions or methods to keep the relationship afloat in complex circumstances. Often, couples naively think that knowing how to deal with relationship anxiety in LDR would strengthen their resolve to keep their relationship strong, but a lot of times they lose focus and interest, hence their relationship breaks apart.
Combating these issues will take a whole lot of manpower from both sides and since most of the time LDR couples are living in different states, the difficulty continues to increase. Faith and communication may not be enough, so here are some tips to help strengthen your resolve in overcoming long distance relationship anxiety.
How To Deal With Anxiety in a Long Distance Relationship
- Manage Time Wisely
Understandably, both you and your partner are living in different timezones, or at least have different schedules. That means you need to compromise and allot a certain time to communicate with each other. Say, for example, your partner lives in Ukraine while you live in the United States, so your night will be their day. It’s either you stay up a little later than usual or wake up early so you can have time to talk to your partner.
- Have Patience
Not every time you and your partner will be following through with plans. Sometimes when you and your partner are excited to do something together on a certain day and something unexpectedly comes up, the mood turns a little sour. Remember, not everything comes according to what you both want; there are things outside of your control that need to be attended to such as emergencies, work, or anything that causes either of you to actively be away for a while. Being patient allows you and your partner to not feel bad about each other; you wouldn’t want your partner to feel too guilty.
Don’t be quick to judge. Sometimes the last thing you or your partner need is either of you bickering about things you couldn’t do anything about.
- Communicate
Nowadays we have the power of technology on our side. Back then you’d have to collect calls and pay heftily, but now, it’s all in the palm of your hands, and with a simple press and a swipe, you’re able to see and talk to each other. Sometimes the internet connection can be an issue, so you need to make sure nothing gets in your way. When you communicate, make sure to be open and honest to ensure trust is being firmly laid; that is one way on how to deal with anxiety in a long distance relationship.
There will always be doubts whether someone is telling the truth or not. The good thing is that you can now easily send pictures and videos to prove your word. But don’t ask for too much or send too little; you wouldn’t want either of you to be a helicopter parent to each other. Allow each other space, and when you both can finally talk, make sure to savor every second of it.
- Look Forward To A Plan
Being in an LDR doesn’t mean you’d be away from each other forever; you will be able to see one another soon. With that said, plan a getaway or activities to do for when that time comes. Having something to look forward to increases each other’s thrills. Having something planned out when you’re both able to see the other feels rewarding; all the months of not seeing each other will all be worth it.
- Maintain Integrity
Just because your partner is not there within miles around, doesn’t mean you should fool around. Lying to yourself is just as worse as lying to your partner. If you want to do something, first think what your partner would think if they find out what you’ve done or how you would feel if your partner would do it to you. People sometimes think they can get away with what they’re doing because the other isn’t around, but at some point, it will come back to haunt and bite you when you least expect it. Always check yourself before you wreck yourself.
- Practice Empathy
It takes a lot of will power to let everything sink in. One must understand that just because it never happened to you, you shouldn’t shrug the idea of not being in the shoes of someone who went through it. Understanding each other’s pressure and grievances about the situation helps relieve your anxieties.
Yes, you feel pain, but what about your partner? Maybe, they’re having it worse than you. That’s why empathy is the most important step to relieving your anxieties when it comes to long distance relationships; you both need to step in each other’s shoes and see through each other’s eyes to understand what is happening in your lives.
Have Faith in Each Other
Loving someone be it near or far takes a lot of strength and faith in each other. Much like Tango, it takes two to take care of your relationship’s anxieties. Have faith that your partner will do their part, as you do yours.
