Why Are Men Not Getting Any Dates on Dating Apps?

For one, it’s not the lack of trying.

According to a study by the famous dating app OkCupid, men are more likely to send the first message than women. Male dating app users, on average, would send 15 first messages, whereas female users, on average, would only send three to four first messages.

Despite the disparity in numbers, most men still can’t land a date on these apps even though they’ve put in the effort to interact.

But why?

The answer is simple. The odds are not in their favor.

As highlighted in a recent study by ABC (Australian Broadcasting Corporation), male users’ probability of finding a match on online dating apps is quite low. On Tinder, women would find a match around 10% of the time, while men around 0.6% of the time.

In other words, men only have a 0.6% probability of finding potential partners online.

Finding Love Online is a Numbers Game

Two Reddit users did a social experiment to test their luck on two famous online dating apps, namely Tinder and OkCupid. They wanted to know the statistics — from the number of matches they get to the number of actual dates they land using these dating platforms.

The results are shocking.

Reddit user Keongmanja documented his 28 days of using Tinder. Here are the results:

Out of his 53 Tinder matches, only nine of them agreed to go on a date. Out of those nine, only four showed up.

Another Reddit user, Meatenigma, did the same experiment. This time with the famous dating app OkCupid. He was able to document 500 days using the app. Throughout this social experiment, he sent a total of 228 first messages to his matches. Here are the results:

Out of the 228 first messages he sent, only 44 women responded, while 184 women did not respond at all. And out of the 44 responses he got, he only managed to get four women to agree to go on a date with him. Out of the four, only two showed up. The other two stood him up or canceled.

The two social experiments bolster the claim that men’s probability of finding potential partners using dating apps is low.

Male dating site users could have hundreds of matches. But only a few of those matches turn into interesting conversations. Likewise, only a few of those conversations turn into actual dates.

Analysis

If you were to ask me why men are not getting any dates on dating apps, my answer would be this:

While online dating apps are convenient platforms to meet and date new people, they are not exactly the best place to find potential partners, especially for men.

Based on the studies and statistics provided above, dating apps do not guarantee quality matches who are looking for the same thing as you.

Most of the people on these apps are either:

• looking for fun (they are using the platform as a pastime); or
• testing their luck in the dating pool but have no intention of dating.

Only a small percentage of these users are looking for actual dates and serious relationships, so the probability of finding someone decent is low.

That said, if you prefer to stick with mainstream dating apps, here’s my word of advice:

Do not get discouraged from the lack of dates. You are not doing anything wrong. It’s just how most mainstream dating apps work. Not every match you get will turn into dates, and you need to accept that fact. If a match leads you nowhere, move on and continue your search. Eventually, you will find someone worth your time.