Realities
Cohabitation? It’s Just a Pseudo-Marriage
So what is cohabitation? What I know about cohabiting is that two individuals in a committed relationship live together for intimacy, convenience, or economic reasons. People think that a couple who cohabits is in it for the convenience of sexual intimacy. Surprisingly, that’s not the case.
Living the Married-But-Not-Really-Married Life
Sometimes, couples live together because of circumstances. Surprisingly, statistics show that a percentage of couples who live together or cohabit do it for economic reasons. This is the case for most couples who have experienced unplanned pregnancies.
Most young adults and the newer generation of older adults prefer to live together in a non-committal setup. Their reason? They just don’t like the idea of being fully committed. They don’t like marriage, but they love the idea of living like a married couple. They want to sleep in the same bed, live in the same house or unit, share financial responsibilities, and have everything else that comes with marriage, save commitment.
There are advantages of cohabitation. Knowing how high the prices of necessities are nowadays, couples would share their finances and resources rather than live separately. Because of the convenience of living with each other, they can spend more time together, have more intimate activities, and be under each other’s surveillance. But not everything is all sweet and dandy.
The Harsh Realities of Cohabitation
Yes, cohabitation has its advantages, but with the pros, come the cons. A lot of long-term cohabiting relationships end up marrying for a while and then ultimately separating. And it’s not just a mere percentage, but a massive scale. So why does cohabitation lead to divorce?
Once they get married, it just seems like how things are, except a few things of course. If you don’t already know, cohabitation allows a couple to be too comfortable with each other, knowing they’d come to each other every single day. They’ve done a lot to keep their relationship together, and soon, they hit a dry spell in terms of stimulating their relationship.
They know each other’s behavior and personality, so they know each other’s tendencies and thresholds. They think they can be forgiven and have their problems forgotten. But, complacency is one of the many reasons why cohabiting couples frequently bicker. And when they start fighting, they start to feel inadequate. With inadequacy, comes insecurity; leading them to infidelity.
I understand that it might just be a slippery slope, but that’s the truth. That’s how a lot of the divorce testimonies are these days.
Should You Do It?
In my opinion, I wouldn’t mind couples immediately moving in with each other. It’s usually how they scope each other out whether they’re compatible to be together for a lifetime or marriage. It’s like playing House with each other, except what you’ll be doing is real—just minus the mommy and daddy roles.
But would you opt to cohabit with your partner? I wouldn't strongly advise not to, but just be aware of the things that would happen. Unless you have a strong foundation with your partner and an unwavering faithfulness to each other, then I don’t see how you two living with each other should be a problem.
If you ever decide to opt for cohabitation, make sure to be transparent but also respectful of each other’s privacy.
