RELATIONSHIP ADVICE
How to Be Financially Independent in a Relationship
People’s standards for what defines a healthy relationship has become more varied as relationships evolve over time. However, there are aspects of a successful relationship that remain constant. One of these aspects is financial literacy. Why is this important and how can couples achieve financial independence?
Financial literacy is the couple’s ability to understand and effectively use various financial skills such as financial management, budgeting, and investing. If both you and your partner are financially literate, you will be able to easily overcome financial challenges in your relationship.
Financial problems are not uncommon in relationships, and depending on how the couple handles such situations, they can either lead to a split or deepen bonds. There will inevitably be gaps in your knowledge when it comes to finance, so if your relationship is to survive long-term, it’s important that you talk about your priorities and improve your financial literacy.
Here’s how to be financially independent in a relationship.
You should not be afraid of having the “Money Talk”.
It is understandable that some couples are not comfortable bringing up the topic of money, as it is a sensitive subject. However, having the money talk doesn’t always have to be awkward. After all, finance is one of the key things to talk about if you’re considering marriage.
The best way to approach this conversation is through open and honest discussion. You can do this by laying out both your concerns on the table and offering open-ended questions. Also, establish an environment where you both can feel at ease having this kind of conversation.
Talk about your goals, spending habits, as well as your financial challenges. Knowing these things allows you to understand each other better, especially when it comes to making financial judgments. And remember that this kind of talk does not have to be concluded in one sitting. You can talk about it for as long as you need, so as to keep you from making hasty decisions.
Discuss the split of your financial priorities.
Splitting your financial priorities is a practical way of approaching your finances as a couple, especially if one is earning more than the other. For example, if your partner is making more money than you are, then splitting your finances 50:50 might be unfair for you. Instead, come to an agreement about balancing your shares according to your capacity to pay.
Discussing this openly helps in preventing hard feelings for each other. It’s not all the time that you or your partner can give half, so be open about giving more for the relationship. This kind of financial judgment further deepens your bond as a couple as you better understand each other and find ways to support one another.
Ensure self-sufficiency.
When you’re moving-in together or considering marriage, it is in your best interest as a couple to start discussing about not keeping all your money in shared accounts.
Yes, managing daily and monthly expenses might be easier when you create a joint checking or savings account. You may also be able to easily finance your goals, like purchasing a new car or saving up for a vacation, as you have your funds combined in one account. However, it is not recommended to send all your money into the account.
Learn to apply the Yours-Mine-Ours rule where you create individual accounts to complement the joint one. Saving a certain amount of your salary for your individual savings can give you financial independence and autonomy, especially in making individual purchases, without having to get the other’s approval. It will make you self-sufficient, as it allows you to spend for yourself without touching your joint earnings.
“Learning how to be financially independent in your relationship might seem like an unpopular opinion. But if you want to overcome financial challenges as a couple, such independence might mean the difference between a split and a successful relationship.”
You are never too old for financial independence. Make yourself more secure as an individual while pursuing deep-rooted romantic relationships at the same time.
Reference:
Kenkare, Pallavi. 2022. How to Stay Financially Independent When Your Partner Makes More.
https://www.cnet.com/personal-finance/how-to-stay-financially-independent-when-your-partner-makes-more/
Team Stash. 2018. How to Declare Financial Independence in a Relationship.
https://www.stash.com/learn/financial-independence-relationship/
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