PSYCHOLOGY
What are the Long-term Psychological Effects of Infidelity?
According to a recent study by Human Life International, infidelity remains one of the top reasons many couples, married or in committed relationships, break up. Roughly 20–25% of marriages are affected by infidelity.
But did you know that heartbreak isn’t the only consequence of unfaithfulness? Aside from the pain of the breakup, it has been pointed out that there are long-term psychological effects of infidelity.
These effects can linger long after the couple has broken up. Worse, even therapy can’t fix some of them. Cheating, whether emotional or physical, might seem trivial to some, but the reality is much worse than many expect.
So if you’ve been cheated on, or if it ever crossed your mind, know what this insidious act does to an unwitting partner.
It can cause an emotional rollercoaster.
Knowing that the person you’ve learned to trust has betrayed you can be overwhelming. A variety of emotions will flood you: guilt, anger, confusion, self-loathing, desperation, sadness, disappointment, and fear, among others. This state of emotional rollercoaster can last from just a couple of days to months — even years.
It can make them lose trust in future relationships.
Experiencing infidelity can truly shake your partner’s faith in a relationship. The act of cheating causes the foundations of their sense of security to fall apart. They end up associating their painful experience to all other relationships, making it difficult to connect with new people. A victim of infidelity may find it difficult to determine if someone’s being sincere, as they protect themselves from further betrayal.
It can give them depression or anxiety.
Infidelity can turn a partner’s world upside down. It can make them feel extreme relationship anxiety where they become overly insecure. Additionally, they often excessively worry about being cheated on again, making them constantly doubtful of other people’s actions and intentions.
It can lower self-esteem.
A person who has been cheated on may experience a decrease in their confidence levels and increased insecurities. They get the feeling of inadequacy. They end up comparing themselves to others and wondering why they’re lacking. If left unaddressed, they may question themselves, their looks, and even their actions. It is not uncommon for people with low self-esteem to think they’re the reason why things fail, even if they’re clearly not the reason for such failures.
It can cause Post-Infidelity Stress Disorder.
Being cheated on can develop intrusive thoughts, depression, insecurities, flashbacks, heightened emotional reactivity and avoidance of reminders related to affairs. PISD is similar to Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), however, differs in the increased depression and anxiety that stem from the paranoia of being betrayed again.
Dealing with the aftermath of infidelity is never an easy task. It is a tedious process that requires a lot of time and effort, understanding, and acceptance. If left to fester, understand that these effects can last for as long as you allow them to.
So if you’re thinking about having an affair outside of your relationship, DON’T! Recognize how these long-term effects can ruin a life — or yours.
Reference:
Davin, Kristin, LMHC. 2022. Are There Long-Term Effects of Infidelity?
https://www.choosingtherapy.com/long-term-effects-of-being-cheated-on/
Winslow, Callen. 2024. 7 Long-Term Psychological Effects of Infidelity & How to Cope.
https://www.marriage.com/advice/infidelity/long-term-psychological-effects-of-infidelity/
Related read
