REALITIES
We Should Stop Romanticizing Romance
What does love look like to you?
We form our idea of love through second-hand experiences. Our views and opinions mostly come from media (literature, movies, and TV shows) and witnessing other people’s relationships. That’s a lot to take in, isn’t it?
Thanks to that, everyone has a set standard on what love should look like for them.
Falling and being in love is a good thing! Who wouldn’t want to share life with a great partner?
Here lies the problem: love can get ugly if you want it for the wrong reasons. Say, for example, you want a relationship because you’ve been single since birth and feel like a loser seeing everyone around you partnered up.
No, you’re not a loser if you feel you’re missing out on something others enjoy. Many of us like romanticizing love as a magical solution to problems, but maybe we should rethink and look at it from a healthier perspective.
How Does Someone Romanticize Love?
When someone romanticizes love, they make fake scenarios about someone else. Think of it like writing a fake script. In this case, the lines consist of unspoken feelings between you and the other person in false settings.
This habit makes people lose sight of reality. It sets up unrealistic expectations because we can’t live up to them. The more we romanticize romance, the more disappointment we’ll get.
No One Can Complete You
And don’t take this as a bad thing.
You may think being in a relationship may fill a void, but it isn’t a cure for resolving loneliness. Relying on someone to “complete” you is an unhealthy way of looking at love. No one can fix you; you can’t be someone else’s sole source of fulfillment either.
People aren’t projects. Doing things without company is impossible, but partners aren’t responsible for your validation. If you aren’t happy as a single person, chances are, you won’t feel any better in a relationship.
Romance Won’t Always Be Pretty
Love isn’t just a feeling. Actions matter just as much because feelings come and go. Relationships don’t always feel magical; they have bad and ugly moments. People are complex beings, which makes love complicated.
It’s easy to get swayed by cute and romantic social media posts of couples. But don’t be fooled by the Instagram stories. Couples have their struggles they prefer keeping to themselves, and that’s not an issue.
Those struggles don’t look sexy, but they help facilitate growth. And there’s no better look than that.
There’s So Much More to Live For
Tragic love stories (like Romeo and Juliet, for example) make us believe life isn’t worth living if we don’t have partners. As romantic as that sounds, the reality is that it’s a toxic perception.
A relationship doesn’t need to be your life’s centerpiece. Sure, having one feels great, but there’s more to life than just falling in love with someone. Being single isn’t (and shouldn’t be) a death sentence.
What if you and your current partner break up? You can mourn your loss, but pick yourself up. Don’t be a bitter ex that refuses to let them move on. Wish them the best, even if it hurts.
Romanticizing romance takes the joy out of it. Why make yourself miserable with unrealistic ideas when you can enjoy love for what it is?
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